EnD oF SeMeStEr!

**I must thank you for those who commented on my last blog. It was really uplifting to hear the repsonses, and I thank you very much. Although some was very confusing....** I would like to clarify that I WRITE on my blog because I am a writer and I feel that everyone has a reason to write, and this is my way of doing it. I can't keep in touch with a lot of my friends, and so I can tell them about my life and everything that is going on through this. So sorry if I am always thinking of myself, but this is my journal.... isn't that the point?
ANYWHO
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It is the end of the semester, and as I look back, in a whole, it went pretty fast. Like yes, I complained a lot for such a short amount of time, but the classes themselves went quickly. I enjoyed my English class immensely, and I am actually sad to be leaving such fine people. I felt really comfortable in that class and I know I learned a lot from my professor; he is a very very smart man and I respect him greatly. As for my other classes, I loved my photo appreciation class in the end. I actually stayed after class one day to show him some of my photographs so he could critique them and he basically said I'm very curious and that makes for a good photographer. It was really nice to have him just tell me what i'm doing, and although it was only good criticism because he said he wasn't going to bash anything, it made me feel good. I just love photographs and I know I won't be basing my life work on being a photographer, it's nice to know that I COULD go into that field of work. And of course my orientation class. That actually ended a couple of weeks ago, but still....without that class, I would have adjusted to WSU a lot slower. They were such an outgoing talkitive group, and that's where I met Jen, Britney, Mike, Kevin, Sarah, Sam, etc. YOU GUYS ARE AWESOME PEOPLE!!!! Gradewise, I basically have all B's, and I won't complain about that. It's my first year of college... so yay!

I'm excited now because all I have left to do is write a four page paper, already have two pages, for my English class, and take a 35 minute final in my photo class on Monday. THEN I AM DONE TILL "NEXT YEAR" haha. It's so nice to have a month off and have no homework. It's basically like a miniature summer, only with snow! And it'll be nice because then i can work and save up for Montana, and Bethel. lol. I'm just really happy as apposed to the last blog I made! OH, I also found out that someone from here has/had a little bit of a liking towards me, and that just made that self conscience feeling lift instantly. I mean nothing will come out of that for reasons that I don't feel like getting into, but to know that your not this un-likeable girl. I dunno....good feeling.

Anna and I are here this weekend, our FINAL weekend, and it's not as bas as usual. We kept busy last night by going to Wal-mart, shopping around at a scrapbooking place, buying Subway, watching Bring It On, and figuring out my Bethel future. It was so busy that 11:00 came by so fast. And we just laughed a lot and were merry. hahaha! I know, I'm crazy today, but it's all good. And now it is snowing and I am very amused! It's so pretty. I am also happy that it's not FREEZING COLD like it has been for the past couple of days. Like that bitter cold where you just don't wanna leave your dorm room, but you must because you need food to survive.

I just also wanted to write that this may be my last post for sometime. I mean I will probably write more over break, but since everyone will be home for a month or whatever, I'm going to be seeing them more, and there is kinda no sense to writing in here if I see everyone. So I wouldn't look for updates too terribly much in the next month, but I will do my best to post if something big happens! I love you all and thank you for being my readers! Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!! Love you all very much!

Sister in Christ, Amy <3>College Moment: Tee hee hee! This was on MSN.com for a week in pictures! Isn't it just the cutest little thing you have ever seen? To make it just almost cuter, it's blind! Everybody go awwww!!

Today I feel....

SELF CONSCIENCE

I'm not sure why, I just do. I think just every once in a while, no matter how great life has been for you, you just feel...ugly, fat, stupid, etc. Now I'm not saying I feel ALL these things ALL the time. I know darn well I'm not stupid, and I'm certainly nowhere near fat. But I dunoo....today is just one of those days. I'm starting to get really scared about Bethel. It just seems no matter what I have someone saying, "wow your a procrastinator, Bethel won't let you get by with that" or "you won't be slacking off at Bethel like you do here" PROCRASTINATION IS HOW I WORK! I can't help that. I know this because this is how I have learned for the last 5 years. I've been on the A Honor roll a handful of times, I think even on the Principles Honor roll once. I'm obviously not doing bad. As much as I know my own strengths and weaknesses, it never seems to fail to have someone's comment finally get to me. What if i'm not good enough? What if fail miserably? The changes are good. It's a smart school... I mean JUSTIN goes there... he was valedictorian. You can't just shrug that off. I'm still going to Bethel, I'm just starting to get that nervous feeling in my stomach. =(

Besides that bothersome thing, I feel.....ugly I guess. I'm not going to use the term "fat" cuz again, I already know I'm not. But it just is this terrible cycle of eating, feeling terrible, eating more. I used to swim here before I got sick and then it got freezing. The pool is all the way across campus, and it's just been soo bitterly cold lately that I don't have the energy to do that. And yes... there are plenty of gym centers here that I could use to my advantage. Except one teeny tiny problem. i'm self conscience!! There are parts of me that i'm not comfortable with, and feel very self conscience with like running or stuff like that. I know I shouldnt' care, but I do. You don't understand. Of course I joke about msyelf in the "upper body" regions, but some people like to use my jokes over and over again. Heh.... I feel great about myself, I tell yah.

And I'm not all bitter. Like I got a B- on my huge English paper, my bowling teaching is letting me make up a day ( I think) and I got an A- on my last quiz in my Mass Media and Society class. Today has been a pretty decent day. I can't complain. Sigh... maybe I just see way too many beautiful girls here and then see myself in the mirror and shudder. Stupid society. Heh.

Maybe tomorrow won't be so bad...

Lets stay together

I, I'm so in love with you Whatever you want to do Is all right with me 'Cause you make me feel so brand new And I want to spend my life with you
They say since, since we've been together Loving you forever Is what I need Let me be the one you come running toI'll never be untrue
Let's, let's stay together Lovin' you whether, whether Times are good or bad, happy or sad Whether times are good or bad, happy or sad
Why, why some people break up Then turn around and make up I just can't see You'd never do that to me (would you, baby)Staying around you is all I see(Here's what I want us to do)

That is "Lets stay together" from Al Green... you might know the song from Down to You, an OLD Freddie Prinze Jr. movie. I found it on a Cd that I was burning to my laptop. It really makes me happy cuz it's just a sweet sweet song! And I felt like posting it cuz hey, why not right? lol. Does anyone else love this song like I do??

Oh, and FYI I have opened up my comments to ANYONE WHO READS IT!! yayayayayay!!! I just realized that I could do that, and I think it's a cool feature... I mean heck, you don't have to be a member to post something! I haven't gotten any post comments in a while. But it's not about the comments! lol. Anywhoo....

Not much to my weekend. My trip to Bethel was cancelled because Natalie was much too busy and I just could not make it work otherwise. It was saddening. To make matters worse my car has died yet again. It's starter well....won't start. Cuz I have all the money to just throw into it. I'm already getting my license plate tabs and paying my insurance. Sigh. It hates me... I tell yah. So my Friday was a tad bit of a downfall. Especially since I did nothing. But I did watch Super Size Me and then we made cookies! It was nice to spend time with my mom. I do'nt get to do that often so it was probably God's way of showing me that I can't ignore her all the time. Holly took the car that night, that was the reasoning for my strandedness. But it was good in the end.

I went shopping with my mom on Saturday, and again we spent some good quality time together. I also did some reading and writing, and did not do a whole lot otherwise. Oh! And I burned Cd's to my computer which is what I've been meanign to do for some time. So yay!! Oh yah... I did have one minor downfall to my weekend. So I was supposed to hang out with this guy friend from work and of course I start freaking out. It's not like I'm trying to DATE him or anything, but anyone from the opposite sex that I don't already know, freak me out! I get scared to call them and sometimes lie to get myself out of things I really don't want to get into I have no idea why I do this, and it's frusturating to me as well as the person recieving my uncalled for behavior. I can't explain myself. But anyway, I did text him and he was like oh we can't do anything tonight because a family thing came up. I just joked around saying to him that I was just blown off and I was sad! It was funnny cuz he was like, oh I'll make it up to you! And I was a tad relieved at the end of it. I mean I REALLY want to get to know him, but at the same time, I don't know if I'm brave enough...why... I have NO IDEA! I mean the guy friends I have now are all people I have known for quite some time and I had no problem with them. And when I met Justin, it was so natural to become friends with him and then date him. But now I am awkward around boys. If someone can explain my specialness for me, please do so! so yah... There's not much else to tell for my weekend! Short post eh? Well... what can I say? Let's just hope my car is fixed soon, or this will be one sad Amy!

Sister in Christ,

Love Amy (AKA Bear as some would call me...awww)

Somewhat College Moment: We were bowling and I tried to take a picture of us!..... well I got me in there pretty welll... haha!

First day of December and Snow!

Oh what a lovely day!

Well to start things off I had a stressful first half of the week! It was crazy! I had an 8 page paper that was due yesterday and a kinda big project for my photo appreciation class. It was big in the fact that it was a power point thing, and he wanted us to find out about a photographer's career and their zones of contention, and frankly, the whole zones of contention thing makes NO sense to me! It's insane! But turns out I didn't have to go on Tuesday (it was just a random draw) but watching everyone else, I knew I just had more information and that I had done it correctly! So yay me! I went today and I asked a girl how she think it went and she was like "you have so much information! It was actually interesting to listen to!" so that made me feel really good. And then my paper....wow. Took me basically all of yesterday. Rarely did I leave my seat to do anything but type and get my printed off papers. It was insane. And to top it all off I had my Mass media and society class that I still had to read for, so I was just like, ok, no break today I guess! But now all the stuff is over and my only stress now is my final for Photo a week from Monday. I have a kind of final paper for English but the one we just did is usually the one he gives us last, but he said it works better if we do it this way, that way we aren't so stressed by the end. Thank God for that!

Last night did get better though! So one of my guilty pleasures is that on Wednesday nights I watch Sex in the City. Yes I know.... BAADD show... shouldn't watch it. But I just simply can't help it! It's not that I watch it to hear about their sex stories or what have you, but I guess I'm intrigued because it is based on four friends, friends that go through everything together, and I love to see that. Friends are HUGE for me, and to see a connection like that makes me happy. The other reason is that two of the four girls are in the Mass Communication major! One is in P.R. (Public Relations) and the other is a Journalist! And Sarah Jessica Parker, although acting, is almost exactly wha tI wanna be in the magazine world. She gets to write her own columns, about whatever she is thinking about, and that amazes me. It's a dream job really. Yah I wouldn't write about sex, but the idea is still the same. Could you imagine to get paid to to write about whatever you feel like? Believe me, you don't get to do that all the time. Plus watching this gets me together with some girls on my floor... it's become a ritual to watch it all together. To get to the point, my RA couldn't host it tonight so she asked me to and of course I said yes! So I finally got around to unpacking (hah) and then people came! There is one of her guy friends named Matt who comes on watches for some odd reason, but he is really fun and it's good getting to know some guys! I love guys and not having any friends besides a sorta guy friend (Josh) down here is deathly! lol. So he was here first and watched the end of Gilmore Girls with me. Tee hee! Good show.... he just laughed. But it was a good time! Eventually Ali came back from her speech thing and Laura (RA) was back from wherever she was and so we were all talking and I was drinking her fake champagne and then we got the idea to play in the snow becaue it was snowing!! It's such a light snow that it's pure powder! So we made snow angels and threw snow at eachother and ran around and wrote things in it and ahhh! It was fun. I have pictures on my facebook about it in case anyone cares. yay!! It was a nice end to a nice evening.

So here I am, just sitting in my room, watching more snow fall down. I'm very content. I think by the end of this year I will miss Winona, for the few people that i came into contact with, that helped shape me, and prob. will be in a book someday when I write about my college experience. That' why I write these blogs. I need to have an outlet to voice my opinions and thoughts. So I may someday return to them and be like oh yahhhh.... and thus use them later in life. Really smart idea eh? Who would just hate it if you got to be elderly and could not remember a darn thing from your childhood?? I know that would kill me! But as it is, I must go.... I will be back again prob by Sunday! Farewell for all!

"Anyone who has seen me has seen the Father. How can you say, 'Show us the Father'? Don't you believe that I am in the Father, and that the Father is in me? The words I say to you are not just my own. Rather, it is the Father, living in me, who is doing his work. Believe me when I say that I am in the Father and the Father is in me; or at least believe on the evidence of the miracles themselves." John 14:9-11

Sister in Christ
<3>
College Moment: Amazing! I still have college moments that are somewhat enjoyable!! This was before we started throwing snow at eachother with no mercy! I look like Santa's little helper, according to Nate! Yay CHRISTMAS AND ALL THINGS THAT GO WITH IT!