loans!!!!

It's funny how loans can be sooo great and yet soo horribly terrifying. Today I'm sitting with papers upon papers of loans and payments and past due notices and thinking to myself, "so this is what happens when Bethel makes you pay them...." How do people live? It's a crazy idea to know that people live like this everyday. That they can feed their kids and pay their mortgage on top of all the debt we have accumlated in our lives. Sure, mine may be from school, but people have $70,000 worth of credit card debt or whatever else. Lucky for me I'm able to go back to school to put them on hold for a while so I can breath again. How do people do it if they do not have this option? Who knows.

The great part of all this, besides everything coming to screeching halt on payments, is that instead of actually owing Bethel $7500 for school this semester, they actually owe ME $127. How did this happen? Good question. God's grace? God's will? Who knows. I'm baffled beyond belief. I must have been looking at all my forms wrong because the second they added my Stafford loans to my Bethel account, I was set. It's been a great relief to know that besides my Stafford loans, I'm set for the semester.

While I still have stresses in my life, I feel like it'll be that much easier with this new development. Everything may be in my reach! Of course I need to remember to make it God-centered. It's so easy for me to say, oh I can do this, oh I can handle this, I have to figure out how to do this, I have to take control of my life. Notice all the I's??? Oye vey! And who knows, maybe God has different plans for me that I am not aware of yet. So I need to stay positive, look to Him for help, and be thankful for the graciousness He has shown me.

Other than that, I'm fine and dandy! It's good to be home after my stint in South Dakota. The roomies and I have also discussed the possibility of getting a puppy! It'd be a really fund dynamic for all of us. And if we treat it like a house dog, then we can all partake in payments and the responsibility. I think it's a great idea. Plus with 6 of us in the house, someone is usually always home. That's good for a pet. :) So we'll see how that pans out in the next few days. Oh yah, and most importantly, ALYSSA'S HOME!!!!!!!!! I'm super excited. A month is too too too long. I get to see her on Sunday and I couldn't be more thrilled! woo!

Amy